


Aunt Flo comes to Visit.

by BarPurple



Series: Deca'verse Additional [8]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Confused Castiel, Dean Being Dean, Gen, Helpful Crowley, Mentions of Menstruation, Sam's Bitchface, Women of Letters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-10
Updated: 2014-09-10
Packaged: 2018-02-16 21:32:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2285172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BarPurple/pseuds/BarPurple
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is sure there is a curse affecting the women of the Bunker.</p><p>He's not entirely wrong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aunt Flo comes to Visit.

**Author's Note:**

> There is talk of periods in this fic, but nothing detailed or graphic. 
> 
> The title is one of those wonderful euphemisms for my least favourite time of the month.
> 
> This is set in the Deca'verse sometime in the future. (I'll clarify that later)

A crash came from the kitchen making Sam and Dean look up from the artefacts they were trying to match against the vague descriptions in a ledger. Kevin was buried in a translation and didn’t even twitch. Dean mused that the newest pair of noise cancelled headphones the kid had bought were obviously worth every penny. Before the brothers could use the distraction as an excuse to abandon their task an explanation in the form of a confused archangel came into the room.

“Sam. Dean. I think there is something wrong with the women. It’s not possession, but there may be a curse at work.”

The Winchester boys exchanged looks that went rapidly from concern to, in Sam’s case understanding and mild puzzlement on Dean’s part. Sam clapped Cas on the shoulder and guided him into an empty chair. The angel looked annoyed that his pronouncement hadn’t been met with the appropriate response; the face was a mix of lost puppy and about to smite that Cas didn’t often wear anymore.

“It’s a sort of curse; well that’s what Dorothy calls it anyway, but not one that we need to break. It’s just that time of the month.”

The penny dropped for Dean and he had to bite his lip to stop himself from laughing at Castiel’s next question.

“What significance does the date have on the emotional state of the women?”

There was a quick silent communication between Sam and Dean that resulted in rock, paper, scissors; so it was Dean who turned to Cas and said;

“They're on their periods, y’know menstrual cycle? Dude, please don’t say I have to explain that to you.”

Thankfully for Dean’s sanity the light bulb went on in the head of his friend. Of course that didn’t bring a close to the awkward subject, Cas always had follow up questions.

“So that’s why the women are cranky, moody and snappy? And it’s just coincidence that they’re all experiencing this at the same time?”

Kevin joined the discussion with a chuckle, his headphones now around his neck.

“Oh you poor naïve angel. When women live together their cycles can synchronise. This is going to happen every month.”

This nugget of information was news to Dean, who raised his eyebrows as he considered it and then said;

“All girl dorms aren’t all pillow fights and trading panties then?”

Sam threw him a bitchface with a healthy dollop of ‘Really dude?’ mixed in for good measure. Cas was looking petrified.

“What do we do?”

Dean shrugged.

“Running for the hills might not be a bad idea.”

“Or you could do something useful.”

Crowley walked into the library holding a piece of paper in his hand.

“You’re going shopping trench coat boy.”

The former King of Hell handed Cas the paper who read it with an increasingly confused expression clouding his features.

“I don’t know what some of these items are.”

Dean looked over his shoulder and read the list aloud.

“Wine, ice cream, and various feminine hygiene products. We should get them hot water bottles as well.”

Dean’s addition got surprised looks from Sam, Kevin and Crowley.

“What? They help with the cramps. Come on guys, I’m not totally ignorant. I’ll hit the store with you Cas. No zapping, we’ll take Baby.”

Cas lowered the hand he had raised and nodded with a weak smile. Sam tilted his head at Crowley.

“And why are you being so helpful? Would have thought women in pain were right up your street.”

Crowley huffed.

“Women in general in pain I’m fine with; Jody unhappy and in pain is a different matter entirely.”

Dean’s smirk was annoying and the leer in his voice was something Crowley intended to make him pay for a later date.

“A different matter entirely, hey?”

“Jody is the only person in this subterranean madhouse that stands between me and a nasty death by prophet…”

Kevin nodded without any shame, his opinion on Crowley; even human Crowley was a matter of record. The Brit threw him a fake smile and continued;

“It’s in my best interest to keep Jody happy and if that means stocking this place to the rafters with Ben and Jerry’s finest then so be it.”

“Uh huh.”

Dean didn’t even try to hide his sceptical look; he had a ten spot bet going with Benny that Crowley had a crush on the former sheriff. Seeing the Crowley wasn’t going to rise to his teasing this time Dean gave Cas a friendly slap on the shoulder.

“Come on Cas. Let’s hit the store.”

Sam was left as six foot four of neutral zone between Crowley and Kevin. An evil little voice in his brain piped up with ‘At least these only want to kill each other, imagine how much worse they’d be if they were premenstrual’. Sam shuddered and shut his treacherous imagination down before it could provide pictures.


End file.
